Hello lovely. So today I stepped a little into the scary truth and made this blog public. It has been my secret confidant for 4 months and have enjoyed writing to myself. I felt no pressure and yet at the same time I feel called to share my thoughts incase it helps others see that it is ok to not be ok.. it is normal to feel muddled and we shouldn’t allow this to hold us back.
The problem is that when we remain in the clutches of all these mind monkeys everything in our lives will feel so much harder. It will feel like we are pushing treacle up a hill with our eyes closed.
Also if we remain in hiding then we are no truly owning who we are which is no good for anyone. You are hiding from people who really need to hear your words and you are hiding from yourself who needs to hear those words more than anyone.
I find my writing helps me on so many levels… the fact it helps others is just a beautiful bonus.
When we share our thoughts they have less of a hold over us.
I feel vulnerable sharing my muddled thoughts with the world but am trusting that anyone who dares to lift the lid on my muddled mind and take a peak inside is struggling in the same way as me and will know how much kindness is needed in this judgy judgy world we find ourselves living in.
I also hope that others will come forward and share their thoughts here too… to help themselves with a little bit of pen and paper therapy but also to help others feel less alone.
I am weeks away from turning 40 and I fall to pieces around my birthdays. It sucks me under and makes the mind monkeys dance all over my brain but this year I am feeling excited to see the clock tick into my 40th year.. I have heard you care even less about what people think. Yay to that!!
I am feeling ready to stand up and be counted in the way I wish to be seen. I have spent a lifetime feeling confused about who I am and where I fit.. I still don’t know the answer and yet it worries me less and less… if I am meant to be in a field dancing in the flowers by myself then so be it. … I would rather that than fighting in the queues in shops fighting for crap I don’t even want.
Anyway… here is to being you, to being me and to both being fabulous.
My love as always