Why is it so hard?

I have just written a blog post over on CreateMore.Space about the importance of our thoughts but why is it so hard?

Why do I struggle so much to keep my head clean and healthy? to keep buoyant and happy?

Why can’t i fully commit?

Why can’t I fully believe?

I have seen many practitioners who operate on the side of the woo-woo (the stuff we struggle to explain) and I say to them that I wish I full believed but a part of me holds back and questions it all. They tell me it is totally normal and they were the same until they had an experience which left no doubt.

Wouldn’t it be lovely for this to be our only job in the world? To learn to think happy thoughts, to believe in our creator (I am not religious but we didn’t just happen by accident)

I have been meditating loads and yet most evenings recently I get to bed time and I can’t be arsed to turn the computer on and fire up the audio… and yet if I committed to there then it would be no question…

That is what I am aiming for… complete mastery over my life.. at the moment I feel like the black dog controls my strings and it is telling me consistently not to bother. That nothing is worth the effort and I may as well sit and stare at Netflix instead.

I don’t want that for my life and so the battle continues… the battle between the life I want and the life which is happening with no effort atall… I have a great life already but what I dream of is magical… I just wish I could commit to being all in to see it through to reality…. I guess all we can do it keep trying and hold the vision until we have an experience which leaves no room for doubt ❤

V xxx

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